Kate Gosselin is used to being in the headlines. The mom star of the TLC hit show “Jon and Kate Plus 8″ went through a very public divorce with husband Jon Gosselin – the tension from which was very evident in the show. The couple even spent part of at least one 2009 episode explaining to viewers their reasons for separating.
Now, the “Kate Plus 8″ single mom is coming to grips with single mom-hood; Jon takes the kids two weekends a month. She has performed on “Dancing With the Stars,” and she took her eight children to Alaska to go camping with Sarah Palin on the ex-governor’s reality show. Kate dished to E! News about dating life after divorce, saying she felt “out-ish, sort of,” back on the dating scene past her twenties.
“But I’m trying to be a little more open-minded,” she said. “If there’s anybody out there that wants to deal with us, that would be good.”
It also seems Kate and Jon are getting along better these days, and that she’s getting the hang of a one-parent household.
“It feels normal to me now,” she said. “I don’t know when that point hit, but it does feel normal…There was an adjustment period, for sure, but I have always been in charge of running the household … so that’s no different.”
Not everyone has to endure the public scrutiny Kate has experienced while going through any sort of separation or divorce. Our genConnect relationship expert and esteemed psychiatrist Dr. Janet Taylor suggests avoiding the urge to jump into a new relationship immediately after divorce, which is exactly what Kate did, she took her time. Dr. Taylor offers tips on enhancing what you like to do already to find the right person for you.
“Sometimes there’s this desperation to find intimacy, so there’s a tendency to jump into the first relationship you come across,” Dr. Taylor says. She suggests asking yourself: Are you lonely? Afraid of being alone? Are you really ready for a partner?
Although many believe opposites attract, Dr. Taylor counters that “that’s not necessarily the case,” noting that many couples who have been together for long periods of time share similar interests and characteristics. She suggests ”thinking about really enhancing things you like to do already.” For example, if you like running, join a running club on the hunt for a potential mate, or a painting club if that piques your interest. Even ask friends if they know someone who may enjoy similar things as you.
As for Internet dating, Dr. Taylor said there are many sites out there that do more than just match people by their interests, and they can be useful tools. “Investigate some of those but whatever you did before, try something new. Be creative. Have a lot of energy. Have fun with it but keep working on yourself as well.”
For more from Dr. Janet Taylor and our dating experts:
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Category: Views on the News