Real Men Want Real Women

[ 0 ] November 2, 2015 |

Our very own expert Dr. Anne Brown made the opening list of articles this week on the popular and renowned app Pulse. Pulse is an app designed to deliver personalized news powered by your professional world. Download the app now to follow more posts from Dr. Anne Brown.

Below is the article featured on Pulse.

In a world where you can be anything… be yourself!

“He /she makes me want to be the best person I can”, is music to my ears when I am working with people in the dating game. In this day and age life can be challenging and couples need to be real partners to succeed in life. So before you start dating get yourself prepared!

  1. Self clarity/the Offer you are to someone!

laughing-together-signs-youre-with-the-right-personWho are you? What makes you laugh, cry, indignant, angry, joyful for starters? Do you want to
make a difference in the world? If so, how? Are you really single? I mean really! Time to say good- bye to the hanger/ons and time to close all the Exit doors. Are you a spiritual person? Are you willing to make room in your life for someone? Set on a path to get clarity on what defines you as being special from others, find your voice and be that person! It helps the person looking for that very person find you!


  1. Partner Clarity/the Offer you are looking for!

Start your list: must have, must not have, and preferences. Somewhere in the must have/must not have you might want to put the “really single” thing. So many people who are seriously interested in finding their life partner “forget” to ask or require this boundary. If you are a monogamous person, best you require the same from your partner. In this list you also want to put things like no sociopaths, liars, issues that are not predictive of a long lasting relationship. Preferences include sports, classical music, reading, working out, theater, museums, travel etc. You may not match up in preferences and over time you may join your partner in his/her preferences because you love being together. I don’t call preferences deal breakers, and I do have concerns that if you don’t get the must/have, must not have list correct you could run into deal breakers.

  1. Confidence and Clarity

Being in the world exuding confidence and clarity attracts confidence and clarity (It may also attract those who want it but don’t have it so take note). Always keep your life going while in the dating game. Do not put it on hold!

  1. Drive or be Driven

In the beginning of a relationship, I believe you should decide if you want to be the male/driving energy or female/being driven energy. If you want to drive, you begin the invites, get numbers, call, email, and let someone know you are interested. If you want to be driven, you encourage, are warm and inviting, respond, and let the driver know you are interested. Clarity is so valuable here. Let someone know who you are and where you are going in life! Once you are a couple the drive or be driven issue transforms into something quite different.

  1. 7019818-holding-hands-loveWe are stronger as a couple than either is as an individual. She/He makes me want to be a better person. He/she is under my skin. We think about each other all of the time. We have differences and we can respectfully work through them. We love the essence of each other. Our worlds are important to both of us. These are the types of comments that suggest you may have found a good partner!

Preparing yourself always makes the road easier. Take the time to do this!

If he wants you to be in his life, he’ll put you there. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.

© Anne Brown, 2015. Permission needed for any form of reproduction.


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Category: Dating, Relationships

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About Anne Brown: Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, RNCS of Aspen Progressive Addiction Solutions and who is in private practice specializing in addictions, has served as the trusted advocate and advisor to Influential Corporate leaders, Trial Attorneys, Athletes, Leaders, [...]
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