Make this Valentine’s Day One for the Books

[ 0 ] February 11, 2011 |

Do you remember what you did last year on St. Valentine’s Day?   Probably not. Because as much as wemight want to make the most of this holiday, it’s all too easy to stay within our comfort zone, and do the things we always do.  Why not take a different approach this Monday?  Allow yourself to step out of the box, and usher your romance into a new dimension.  Here are five suggestions to get you started:

1. Let yourself experience a new approach to sex.  Identify a woman you find particularly sensual.  When you make love, pretend you are that woman. Make love the way you imagine she would – move the way she would move, touch your partner the way she would touch, and say the things she would say.  There’s no need to tell your lover you are experimenting, just play with this different perspective and see where it takes you.  Allow her to introduce you to sides of yourself you didn’t know existed!

2. Eat dinner with your fingers.  Eating can be such a sensual experience.  Make the most of your Valentine’s Day meal by dining in the privacy of your own home, without cutlery.  But forget the delicate finger foods – enjoy pasta, or sushi, or ribs……..and be sure to lick your fingers!  Turning your evening meal into foreplay is easier than you think!

3. Role play a new romantic situation.  For example, how would you make love differently if you were conceiving a baby?  Or losing your virginity?  Making love can become an extraordinary experience when you imagine unusual circumstances.  How would your night be different in these situations?  How would it change the way you talked to each other, touched each other, and looked at each other?  Plan your evening accordingly and enjoy the sensations!

4. Would you enjoy making love to yourself? Imagine who you are as a sex partner.  Most people feel there is a lot of room for improvement when they visualize who they are in bed.  It is oh so easy to get stuck in sexual routines and become a less involved, responsive partner.  Everyone can do something to become a better lover.  Identify one or two things to do differently, and gift your partner with a new you on Valentine’s Day.

5. Turn back time.  Who were you decades ago?  Most people change as they age – including in the bedroom.  Show your partner who you were sexually in the years before you met.  Were you more inhibited?  Or more sexually free?  Let your partner see this side of you that he’s never  had the opportunity to know.  Re-experience the sexuality of your past.

This Valentine’s Day, try out one of these ideas, or let them inspire you to create one of your own.  With a little planning and creativity this week, you can gift yourself and your lover with a memorable, exciting holiday that would make even St. Valentine proud!

For more Valentine’s Day tips from life’s best experts, click here.

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Category: Intimacy, Relationships

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About Dr. Marianne Brandon: Dr. Marianne Brandon is a clinical psychologist and Diplomat in sex therapy through AASECT. Dr. Brandon is Director of Wellminds Wellbodies LLC in Annapolis, Maryland. She is author of Monogamy: The Untold Story and co-author [...]
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