I find that setting realistic and attainable goals, whether they are short-term or long-term, is the best game plan if you want to accomplish anything in life, and that also certainly pertains to love.

Related: 8 Tips & Tools for Understanding Your Own Love Map

Here are my 5 tips to getting you back into the dating game:

1. Set a Goal: Goal setting is the #1 way to accomplish anything. This is the starting point because this will drive your actions. Without direction of where you want to go, that’s comparable to driving without a road map or clear directions of how to get from point A to point B. You might eventually get there, but probably with many detours, rerouting and backtracking. And for me, it means a lot of wasted time and energy that could be better put to use in actually getting to where you want to go. (Love Example: I will go to 10 new places to meet eligible men).
2. Make an Intention List: You would be surprised to learn that setting your intentions on something, like for example, losing a certain number of pounds by a specific date, will get you there faster than just having a ‘pie in the sky’ attitude about it. For me, my intentions drive my actions. And as you well know, just thinking about it and mulling over it is far less effective than stating your intention about a specific goal and giving yourself a deadline. (Love Example: I will meet 5 desirable dates by May 1^st by being more approachable).
3. Write a Commitment Letter: Writing things down always has been proven to be a powerful tool in accomplishing anything in life and this holds true for your love life, as well. I’ve found that when I write a commitment letter to myself and sign it, it becomes more concrete and tangible as opposed to just a promise I make to myself. I print out my commitment letter, sign and date it and post it on my fridge or somewhere I will see it every day. This will serve as a reminder of what my goal is and keep me on track in fulfilling that promise and keeping the commitment to myself.
4. Progress Report: Keeping a progress report that charts your efforts will give you a visual of how far you’ve come and how far you have to go to meet your goal. This is an incredibly powerful and motivating technique that I’ve found invaluable when I want to succeed. Make a daily progress report with the following: a) Goal for the day, b) Was it done, c) Course of action if you did not meet your daily goal and a new due date, d) Initial the new due date and move forward.  This will allow you to have off days but not to allow you to wallow in your misstep. There is nothing worse than beating yourself up when things don’t go as planned. Just assess where you went wrong, acknowledge it, make a new plan and move FORWARD.
   

   Jackie Lee

5. Reward: I’ve found that having a payoff, whether it be buying that pair of killer shoes I’ve been eyeing, or splurging on a massage, always keeps me motivated, especially on those days when your energy is sapped and you begin to rationalize why you don’t need to keep track on your commitment. It doesn’t have to be anything big or expensive, but something tangible and something you really want that makes you feel special. Ultimately it is whatever that will keep you motivated to succeed.

Related: How to Start Dating Again After a Breakup

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I never waste my time waiting for the phone to ring in hopes of a date. When there aren’t any desirable prospects on the horizon, I like to take myself out on a self-date. Not only is it fun and empowering, it also gives me ample opportunity to meet someone new! In all honesty, some of the best dates I’ve ever been on have been with me!

Related: 5 Illusions That Can Ruin Your Sex Life

There is no need to worry about someone else’s happiness, if you’re going to be stood up, or if you’re going to be compatible. Also, you get to make the plans and/or change your mind and go somewhere entirely different depending on where your mood takes you. I love sitting at the bar of a great eatery and treating myself to a fabulous meal. Sitting at the bar allows for more interaction with other patrons because you’re not at a table and separated. I find it amusing to listen in on some of the unavoidable-to-hear conversations that go on at the bar and get a glimpse into other people’s lives. I have to admit, I have laughed out loud sometimes at some of the bizarre and odd things I’ve overheard!

Related: Do Gender Roles Still Apply In This High-Tech Dating Age?

So, how do you plan your self-date? Here are my 3 tips on how to make it a memorable night. But I warn you, you will have so much fun, you’ll wonder why you didn’t do this before!

1. Location, Location, Location: You want to either have a go-to local spot where you already know the bartender/staff. This makes the entre into an unfamiliar spot avoidable and less daunting. Knowing the bartender is always a good move, because you’ve already established a relationship. She/he can suggest new wines that are close to your liking, etc… I personally like to go somewhere new. I find this gives me a fantastic opportunity to try a new menu and also to scope it out for a possible date location with someone else. No matter where you choose, someplace familiar or new, shed your insecurities, saddle up to the bar and prepare to wine and dine yourself!
2. Attire: Just as where you will go on your self-date is important, what you wear will also be just as important. For example, you do not want to wear something too flashy, like a sequin dress, or something too revealing when dining out solo. For one, you do not want to draw unwelcoming attention to yourself. Two, you want to attract the welcoming glances from potential dates as well as approving nods and glances from men and women alike. Three, dressing appropriately always puts you in a flattering light and makes you look inviting while giving you self-confidence.
3. Enjoy yourself and have FUN: The whole point of a date is to spend time in the company of someone you like, appreciate and find adorable. You already have those in the bag. So relax, be your effervescent self and enjoy the moment. Sometimes I find that finding myself outside of my comfort zone, brings out the best in me. And since no one knows you, you have the perfect opportunity to put your best self forward and meet some new people (something which you really can’t easily do on a date with someone else).

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In these modern times of high-tech with gadgets galore, is it necessary to stick with the dating morays of yore? Just as our technology has evolved, have our dating gender roles evolved, as well? 

I think this subject matter is a hot-button issue, especially with the political environment pushing equal pay for women. I agree with softening the burden on men to pay for everything. If women want to stand toe-to-toe with men, shouldn’t they also sit toe-to-toe with them also, especially when it comes to picking up the tab?

Related: Don’t Make the Same Dating Mistakes This Year

While this seems quite logical and prudent, how far do we go in terms of dating? Will women now ask the men out? Do women become pursuers? And how would men REALLY feel about this? Are men ready to be wooed?

The reality is, while men might be flattered by the attention and pursuit by desirable women, deep down inside, their DNA makes it impossible for this to become the new norm. Yes, there certainly are many instances with couples swapping gender roles, i.e. the woman is the primary breadwinner with stay-at-home dads, but those are exceptions and not the rule. Could gender roles soften as new generations opt for blurred gender roles? Yes. And while it might be viable and preferred by some, for the majority the traditional male – female roles in relationships will still prevail.

Here are my reasons why:

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1) Men are wired to be the pursuer – Men think differently than women. This has long been established. And the notion that they would be comfortable being pursued is not something they would ever truly come to terms with. For example, in my experience, no matter how capable I am and independent I become, at the end of the day, the guy always still wants to rescue me somehow, whether it be opening the bottle of wine or fixing something. Guys want and need to do this. Would they be flattered and appreciative if you picked up the tab once in a while? Of course! But I assure you deep down there are inherent and undeniable needs for the man to take care of the woman. I can personally attest that when I have tipped that balance, the relationship fizzled.

2) Women are wired to be pursued – Women want and need to be wooed and pursued. No matter how successful and independent she may be, everything goes out the window when she is interested in a man that has shown interest in her. Women want and need to be chased. And while it may go against her independent thinking, they instinctively know that ultimately they will have to abide by the rules of pursuer and pursued if they are going to win the affections of the ones they desire. Just like in the Movie “Big Fat Greek Wedding” the mother says to her daughter to the effect, “your father is the head, but I am the neck. I can move his head anyway I want, BUT I have to make him think that it was his idea.” The mother knows what role she plays in this relationship.

Related: 5 Questions to Determine if Your Date Is ‘Dinner Worthy’

3) Non Gender-Specific Balance – When dealing with non-heterosexual relationships, whether you’re a man or a woman, your situation obviously doesn’t fall under the two reasons cited above. However, the masculine and feminine roles still do prevail. There are definitely clear and definitive roles in the dynamics of these relationships, too. These male-female roles in this case are upheld by either two men or two women.

At the end of the day, the important thing is for you both to decide what role each of you will play in YOUR relationship early on. You BOTH must decide and work to keep that delicate balance to maintain harmony in order for YOUR relationship to continue and thrive.

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Subscribe to genConnect’s new YouTube channel here for more relationship advice

But those who are still in search for even a Mr./Mrs. Maybe, keep reading. If you’re at all like me, I’ve found that at the year’s end, doing some self-inventory about my actions, inactions and missteps is a healthy and cleansing thing. It’s a fantastic way to look at who and what attracted you this year. And assessing what worked and what didn’t will be extremely helpful in formulating your plan of action for the New Year.

Related: 5 Questions to Determine if Your Date Is ‘Dinner Worthy’

As we all enter the New Year with an open heart and an open mind, you may want to consider these tips to bolster your chances as we plunge back in the dating pool:

1. Believe in Your Own Product – You can’t sell your product if you don’t believe in it. A healthy dose of self-confidence goes a long way in life and certainly applies in dating. There is nothing sexier than self-confidence sans self-absorbed ego. For example, when you go on your dates this year, walk with a little strut, swagger and bounce. I assure you your date will definitely take notice.
2. Make a List and Check It Twice – I find that making lists is a great way to give you clarity when approaching anything in life – and that includes dating. Making a list of likes and dislikes will help you narrow down what worked and what didn’t in your dating experience. Being clear about what works for you will help you make better decisions and choices. For example, if you find that you kind of go along with whatever your date suggests, while this may seem like you’re an easy going person that can go with the flow, it actually works against you. Figure out what it is YOU want out of a specific date. Do you want just a casual fun night out or something more serious? Knowing what you want will save you a lot of wasted time and energy.Take the time to make your honest assessment list of likes and dislikes as well as your dos and don’ts. This will be a helpful guide you can refer to time and again so that you are continuing the things that work and not repeating the same missteps when dating.
   

   Jackie M. Lee

3. Form A Game Plan – I’ve found that a plan of action is always beneficial when I want to be successful in any endeavor. Make a three-month, six-month and one-year game plan when dating. This may mean for example, by the three-month deadline, you can plan to go to 10 more new places and events that would give you opportunities to meet a potential date. By committing to a plan with a course of action, you will definitely increase your chances of meeting Mr./Mrs. Right.

Follow Jackie M. Lee on Twitter @DinnerWorthy and Facebook

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Not getting what you want out of your dates? Are you sending the right cues?

Before you embark on the dating scene, you must assess what it is that you want for yourself. More specifically, you must figure out what type of person you are. For example, if you’re more traditional and respond better to more traditional dating roles, i.e., the guy calls, asks you out and takes the lead,  or you like a more equitable non gender specific approach, being very specific in your language about how you convey that to your potential date can spare you from a lot of disappointments.

Related: Mastering the Art of Seduction – One Bite at a Time

Wishful thinking is not going to get you what you want. I assure you the guy is just as unsure about how to approach without stepping on some toes. When you are sure about what it is that works for you and express it in a positive way, the better your chances of you meeting the RIGHT person for you. You still may have to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet your Prince Charming, but it will dramatically reduce how many you will have to kiss!

WATCH: The Link Between Food and Sex

Here are some of my tips:

1. Be honest with yourself – This is crucial. I cannot impress upon you how important this is. Be truthful about what it is that makes you happy. There is no right answer, only what is right for you. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve gone along on a date pretending I was okay with something to feel deflated and underwhelmed after a date, only because I was being too polite to speak up. Being clear and being able to speak up is your responsibility. But be kind about it and express it in a warm way so that your date understands that what he is offering may not be what you’re looking for.
2. Listen– Being a good listener not only is a great skill to master, it will also provide you with key information while assessing if your date is the right match for you. People speak volumes about who they are and what they are all about if you listen. So tune in and listen for cues and specific language of your dates so that you can best decide if he/she is the right fit.
   

   Jackie Lee

3. Be specific from the start – Don’t be shy about expressing what you want and how you want to be treated. If you are a caviar and champagne girl, don’t pretend to be comfortable with hot dogs and beer. There is no shame in expressing that you want and like that. The only shame is in when you are afraid to voice that and sit wishfully thinking that your date will be able to read your mind! Not only will this result in both of you not getting what you want, it will just be a waste of both of your time.

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Mastering the art of cooking is a skill everyone should acquire. But before you can walk, you need to crawl.

If you have a loved one who is interested in cooking but isn’t too savvy in the kitchen, I recommend the perfect gift, How To Cook Everything by Mark Bittman. I would describe it as an updated “Joy of Cooking,” or a similar cookbook that your mom (or grandma) might have used.

What I love about this book is that it provides a working glossary of cooking terms, measurement conversions, cooking temperatures for meats as well as other useful information to assist you in perfecting a dish.

It also provides the novice and more seasoned cooks with tried and tested recipes to fundamental sauces and cooking techniques, which are essential building blocks to more complex dishes. This is a MUST-have cookbook, and I refer to it at times when I’m not certain about a specific measurement for a dish, like a souffle.

Another recommendation is the companion book, How To Cook Everything Vegetarian, also by Mark Bittman. Equally well tested, this cookbook provides useful information about how to resource vegetarian products to create delicious meatless meals.

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Chef Jackie M. Lee

Chef Jackie M. Lee shows you how to set the mood for your Dinner Worthy date…from the first sip

The first time you entertain your Dinner Worthy date in your home is a notable event and an opportunity to impress. That’s more the reason why you might consider creating that unique cocktail or brushing up on your wine IQ for your special night. When I want to really impress, I like to create a specialty drink or cocktail to offer my DW candidate. It’s an opportunity to booster my seduction meter and to put my date at ease with a delicious elixir to tickle the taste buds. If your date is not into cocktails, knowing how to maneuver a wine list will not only earn you coveted brownie points but might also garner you that unspoken nod of approval.

Related:  5 Questions to Determine if Your Date is ‘Dinner Worthy’

First, COCKTAILS – check out my 3 Top drinks below that will help to showcase your mixology skills:

1. 

   Pomegranate Mojito

   Cucumber Ruby Grapefruit Martini – This refreshing martini with cucumber essence is a great and fresh way to start your night. I cut up some cucumber slices and marinate them in some vodka overnight in the fridge. In a martini shaker, add ice, I slice of marinated cucumber slice, add fresh ruby red grapefruit juice, cucumber infused vodka and shake well. Pour into martini glass, garnish with a fresh cucumber slice and serve.

2. Pomegranate Mojito – Nothing is more delicious than this citrus and mint tropical drink with a hint of pomegranate juice. I use a light rum, fresh mint, lime slices and dark amber agave nectar for the simple syrup. In a cocktail glass, muddle together, mint leaves, lime slices and agave nectar. Add ice, rum, a TBSP of pomegranate juice and seltzer water to finish.
3. Strawberry Basil Margarita – Who can resist a delicious margarita? Bump up the sexy meter with this delicious twist on the old favorite. The basil adds a floral anise flavor that truly complements the strawberries. I like to serve this on the rocks. In a blender, puree, 1 pint strawberries, 4 fresh basil leaves, 1 TBSP sugar, and a ½ cup water and reserve. In a cocktail glass, add ice, rum and ¼ cup of the fruit puree, 1 dash if triple sec and 1 tsp. lime juice. Mix well and serve with strawberry garnish.

Second, WINES – check out my 3 Red and 3 White stand outs that showcase your sommelier skills:

Related: Master the Art of Seduction—One Bite at a Time

White:

1. Viognier – A fantastic change from the usual chardonnay or sauvignon blanc. The Viognier is noted for spice, floral, citrus, apricot, apple and peach flavors. It typically produces medium bodied wines with relatively high acids and fruit.
2. Reisling – Californian Rieslings tend to be dry and have a melony taste, while Germanic Rieslings are more tart and ‘grapefruity’. Other typical Riesling flavors include fruity and floral, as well as honey and musky. Rieslings should be served cool at 47F (but not as cold as fridge temperature).
3. Cava – My goto sparkling favorite from Spain is a superb way to start your night. The grapes traditionally used for Cava – macabeo, xarello, and parellada – make Cava a light, white, fruity, perfumed wine. This is a delicious change from champagne and is perfect for cheese.

Related:  Don’t Be Afraid to Ask For Help Choosing Wine (VIDEO)

Red:

1. Red Rioja – The red wine from the region of Spain with the same name. The “red Rioja” is most well known style of Rioja. Classic, bold, these wines taste mostly of their tempranillo roots and have a bright, fresh flavor to them. This goes extremely well with steak and other hearty meats. Serve red Riojas at 61F – they do not need decanting.
2. Amarone – Both recioto and amarone are made with grapes that have been dried on racks, bringing out their flavors.  Amarone is the fourth biggest seller in Italy, behind Chianti, Asti, and Soave. This fine wine has flavors of licorice, tobacco and fig, and goes well with game and ripe cheese.
3. Pinotage – A welcoming alternative to the humdrum cabernet or merlot, Pinotage has a distinctive flavor, very fruity with an underlying taste frequently compared with banana. It can be drunk young, to maintain its fruity flavor. It also ages well, and the mellowing effect allows the wine to taste like a mature bordeaux. Pinotage pairs well with stews and other rich dishes. It should be served at 61F – warmer than fridge temperature but not “room temerature” in modern times.

More from Chef Jackie M. Lee: Cook Up Passion for a Sexy Night In

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You shouldn’t just have dinner with anyone. After all, it’s your time that’s being spent scouting out that perfect companion, right? 5 questions to ask yourself to determine whether your date is really worth your time…

Before you can even begin to determine if your date is “Dinner Worthy,” I reserve some time and really think about some key points that weigh heavily on whether I offer that coveted dinner invitation. There’s certainly no point in going to all that trouble and effort if your date doesn’t measure up. Here’s what I’ve come up with to simplify that process.

Related: Master the Art of Seduction – One Bite at a Time

On your search for Mr. or Mrs. Right, are you asking the right questions for yourself? I know I am very guilty of giving my power away. We all do that sometimes when we meet someone special and really want it to work. You get caught up in the relationship and often lose the relationship with yourself. Believe me, I can count too many times where I’ve allowed someone in my life that kind of took over. So, to avoid those drainages of time and energy, ask yourself these 5 questions and see what your answers are. How does the scale weigh? Your honest answers will help you determine if this person is right for YOU:

Related: Is Your Date ‘Dinner Worthy’?

1. How does he/she add value to your life? – Does this person bring components that make your life better? In what way and are you satisfied with the manner in which he/she does that?
2. Does he/she allow you to be yourself? – Does this person accept you for who you are, warts and all? Does this person allow you to be flawed, human?
3. Does he/she fit into YOUR life? – Does this person support your passions and dreams and helps in your efforts to facilitate them?
   
   

   Chef Jackie M. Lee

4. Does he/she truly value you for just the way you are? Does this person reserve personal judgment and does not try to project his/her personal fears and worries from his/her past relationships onto you? Can this person really just let YOU be YOU?
5. Does he/she bring out the best in you? – Does this person make you feel like you can accomplish anything you want to put your mind to? Does this person challenge and inspire you in ways that make you dig deeper and never give up?

Follow Jackie M. Lee on Twitter @DinnerWorthy and Facebook

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The whole point of dating is to create experiences that will ultimately lead to a lasting relationship. So how do you ramp up your game? How do you stand out in a sea of potential mates?

Mastering the art of seduction is not only for the bedroom. Creating that excitement building, heart pounding experience outside the bedroom may be your prescription to success IN the bedroom.

Related: Is Your Date ‘Dinner Worthy’?

Wooing a potential love interest, to steer them in your direction is a skill that everyone wants to master. The adage, “the way to a loved one’s heart is through the stomach” certainly had merit. No doubt, anyone can make a dinner reservation, but would you be able to pull off an intimate dinner for two, in your home?

The ins and outs of creating that special dining experience in your home and knowing how to create that “home-field” advantage is a sure way to stand out.  These tried and tested tips will guide you in romancing your date with finesse, ease and confidence.

Related: How to Eat, Drink & Date This Summer

My TOP 5 TIPS

Tip 1:  Do some homework. While out on your “getting to know” dates, take the time to notice and make mental notes of your dates food preferences, likes and dislikes. This will be essential in helping you create that tailored menu for your BIG date. Not only will this win you brownie points with your date later when you mention how you remember how he/she liked a certain thing, this will also create that sense memory experience and deepen your intimacy factor by attaching a certain food experience with a specific date. Who wouldn’t be flattered by that?

Related: The Link Between Food and Sex (VIDEO)

Tip 2: Keep your cool. You do not have to be a gourmet or expert chef to put together a fantastic 3 course meal. In this age of the internet and the endless sites geared towards the culinary savvy, or not so savvy, your roadmap to an impressive 3 course meal is just a click away.

Tip 3:  Keep it simple. Do not attempt to make a soufflé if you’ve never made one, why would you put that kind of pressure on yourself? Stick to simple yet delicious dishes that you already know your date likes. Or if you are terrified of the stove, you can make a combination of some pre-made foods and things you’ve made and plate them yourself or modify recipes to simplify an overly complicated dish to fit your skill level. Whichever route you take, your date will be impressed by the time and effort you took in creating that special meal just for them!

Related: Cook Up Passion for a Sexy Night In

Chef Jackie M. Lee

Tip 4: Preparation, Preparation, Preparation. Unless you are a seasoned professional chef, DO NOT leave everything to do the last minute. The key in keeping your cool on the BIG night is to prepare things ahead of time, like for example, shop for the dry ingredients the day or two before. This way, the shopping for the fresh perishable ingredients for the dinner on the day of your date will be a short and quick trip.

Tip 5: Think SMALL. Really, take this advice very seriously. You do not want to stuff your dinner date with giant portions. The seduction comes from building the excitement and pacing the reveal. Small portions will allow your dinner guest to feel satisfied but NOT stuffed. Remember, the dinner is a seduction tool to the real prize, YOU!

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What makes a person “Dinner Worthy?” What qualities and attributes make a person worthy of you going to the store, schlepping all the groceries home and preparing a specially tailored meal specific to his/her taste?

WATCH: Create Your Love Life Resume, with Julie Spira

In my pursuit of love, I have compiled a list of my notable “Dinner Worthy” qualities I find desirable in a date. While you may have to kiss a lot of frogs before finding that perfect dinner companion, I find that having a master list handy is a tremendous asset when on the hunt. That list can help you determine what top qualities and attributes are most important to you, and which ones can you live without.

Compare yours to mine and see how your dates measure up. Granted, my list is kind of the Holy Grail and you may not get all of them in one person, but with this handy list already in your arsenal, creating your own list will be as easy as 1, 2, 3!

Related: Understanding Your Own Love Map, With Rachel Sussman

Here are 10 things to consider when determining if your date is “Dinner Worthy”…

1. Kindness: This can come in the form of kindness to strangers, the elderly, and his parents. For me, this is a quality that shows he will be kind to you.
2. Sense of Humor: This can be a sharp wit, silly campy humor, the ability to laugh at himself or tell a joke on himself, and to find humor in life and share that with you.
3. Integrity: That’s about being able to tell what’s right and wrong, and has a lot to do with the respect shown to others and the core values he upholds and lives by and not so much about being law-abiding (although, that’s pretty important, too).
4. Romantic: Romance can mean different things to different people. For me, romance comes in small gestures, such as he remembering the particular flower I like (Gerber daisies by the way), and bringing a few home for me, or my favorite dark chocolates from Jacques Torres on the Upper West Side. Although, if he bought me a first-class ticket to Paris and told me he had already packed my bags with all my favorite shoes, clothes, and makeup, I wouldn’t be too disappointed.
5. Ability to plan a date: Can he pick a place, make a reservation, and tell you what time to meet? A man with a plan, you’ve got to love that!
6. Self-Confidence: There is nothing sexier than self-confidence. That easy swagger that comes from inner strength (not ego and self-centeredness). It’s that ability to show you his human side and be vulnerable – that’s self-confidence!
7. Great Kisser: This can really be a deal-breaker for me. If you don’t know how to kiss a woman, go find out! No thrusting or jamming of your tongue down someone’s throat. I already know what you had for dinner – I’m looking for some dessert. You know, those kisses that make you a little weak at the knees? Yeah, those … Is it getting hot in here?
8. Punctuality: In this age of cell phones, there is no excuse for waiting in fear of being stood up. If you’re going to be late,      text, call, telegram, pony express … you get my point.
9. Athletic: Ok, who doesn’t like a man or a woman who’s active and takes care of themselves? A well-toned body only tells me he/she respects and cares about himself, that’s sexy!
10. Adventurous: This can come in the desire to travel to uncharted destinations or the willingness to try Uni for the first time. The willingness to explore and try new things shows me a spirit that is still evolving and growing, and that’s a beautiful thing.

Follow Chef Jackie Lee on Twitter @DinnerWorthy and Facebook

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One homeopathic remedy I’ve found to be a relief for itchy watery eyes is an herb from the figwort family called Eyebright or Euphrasia. Eyebright is full of niacin, manganese, potassium and ascorbic acid and is known for its astringent, antihistamine and antiviral properties. Take about 35 drops of tincture orally 3 times a day or take a 30C tablet once or twice a day for relief.

Another effective remedy is Stinging Nettles, and herbalists swear by it. It provides relief not only for itchy, irritated eyes, but also the scratchy throats often caused by seasonal allergies. Stinging Nettles are also rich in iron and trace minerals. Take one 435mg capsule every 2 to 4 hours as needed, or try drinking a few cups of stinging nettle tea for relief.

Now, get out there and bask in the glory of Spring!

For More From Jackie M. Lee:

• Food Allergies & What to Eat Instead, by Chef Jackie M. Lee (RECIPES)
• Food Allergies: What You Need To Know by Jackie M. Lee
• How to Cook Up Passion For a Sexy Night In

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ALLERGY: Dairy: milk and milk products (Lactose Intolerance)
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Soy, almond and rice milk products are great alternatives.

ALLERGY: Eggs: Eggs and egg products
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Arrow root or potato starch are great substitutes for eggs in baking.

ALLERGY: Shellfish: Shrimp, lobster, clams, mussels, snails and other seafood with shells
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Squid is a substitute with a similar chew feel.

ALLERGY: Fish: Bass, flounder, cod and other seafood not in a shell
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Wakame seaweed provides that fresh “ocean” flavor.

ALLERGY: Gluten:Wheat and wheat products (Celiac Intolerance)
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Rice pasta or other whole grains like quinoa and millet are great substitutes.

ALLERGY: Tree Nuts: Almonds, walnuts, pecans
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Toasted pumpkin and sunflower seeds are delicious alternatives with a crunchy punch.

ALLERGY: Peanuts
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD:Roasted soy nuts is a great substitute, and  can can be turned into soy nut butter for spreading.

ALLERGY: Soy: Soy beans and soy products
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Almond, coconut and rice milk products are superb and tasty alternatives.

ALLERGY: **Fruit: Kiwi, strawberries and other fruits
WHAT TO EAT INSTEAD: Wild honey or agave nectar are nice alternatives when you want to add some sweetness to your food. ** Note: Fruit is not on the FDA’s list of “8 major allergens” but I have had many clients with serious fruit allergies so I find it important to address.

Two of my favorite recipes I’ve used to tantalize my clients while addressing a specific food allergy include:

For those who are lactose intolerant (suffer dairy allergy) …

Apple Pancakes with Cinnamon Syrup

½ Cup All Purpose Flour
½ Cup Whole Wheat Flour
1 Egg
1 Granny Smith Apple
2 Tbsp Vegetable Oil
1 1/2 Cup Almond, Soy or Rice Milk
1 Tsp Baking Powder
1 Tsp Sugar
½  Tsp Salt
1 Cinnamon Stick
1 Cup Maple Syrup

Directions:

1. In a small sauce pan, place the syrup and cinnamon stick and bring to low simmer. Remove from heat and let stand to infuse the syrup with cinnamon flavor.
2. In a mixing bowl, place all of the dry ingredients and stir.
3. In a small bowl, lightly beat the egg. Add the milk and vegetable oil.
4. Peel, core and cut apple into quarters.  Grate the apple in a box grater (large slot)
5. Add the grated apple into the dry mixture and toss gently (this will keep the apple pieces from all falling to the bottom)
6. Add the wet ingredients and mix thoroughly.
7. In a medium, non-stick skillet, prepare pancakes.
8. Serve with warm cinnamon syrup.

For those who are celiac intolerant (suffer gluten, wheat allergy)

Linguini with Provencal Sauce

1 Lb. of spelt pasta
6 Plum Tomatoes (cored and medium diced)
½ Cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
4 Cloves Fresh Garlic
¾ Cup Calamata Olives (pitted)
1 Small Yellow Onion (small diced)
1 Tbsp Capers (drained)
4 Basil leaves (rough chop)
Salt
Pepper
Grated Parmesan Cheese (optional)

1. Bring 3 quarts of water to boil in a large stock pot.
2. Salt the water (about 4 Tbsp).
3. Cook spelt pasta as per directions on box.
4. In a large skillet, add the olive oil and sauté the onions until tender.
5. Add the garlic, olives, capers and diced tomatoes and heat through for about 1 or 2 minutes and remove from heat.
6. Add the basil leaves and salt and pepper to taste.
7. Drain the pasta and place back into stock pot.
8. Add the Provencal sauce and toss together.
9. Serve immediately with Parmesan cheese.

Also visit:

• Food Allergies: What You Need to Know
• How to Cook Up a Passionate Meal for Two
• Healthy Lunch Options for Students
• Marcus Samuelsson: The Taste of Heritage (VIDEO)
  

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Working as a Private Chef in New York for highly discerning clients, I am especially diligent about meeting the specific needs of every person. So in order to cook allergy-friendly foods that don’t compromise on taste or flavor, I became highly educated on the subject. Here’s what every food allergy sufferer (and those who cook for them) should know.

What is a food allergy and what causes it? The body’s immune system is normally designed to defend against potentially harmful substances, such as bacteria, viruses and toxins. However, some people experience an immune response triggered by a substance that is generally harmless, such as a specific food.  In a true food allergy, a particular food can trigger your body to produce immunoglobulin E (IgE) antibodies, which, in turn, set off the body’s immune system to release histamine and other chemicals into your blood stream. Those chemicals cause the body to experience allergic reactions so ordinarily innocent foods can have disastrous, sometimes fatal, implications.  Symptoms can range from mild gastrointestinal discomfort to face and throat swelling and sometimes, anaphylaxis which can be fatal.

Symptoms

Symptoms commonly begin immediately or usually within two hours after eating. If a person experiences these symptoms shortly after eating a specific food, he/she may have a food allergy. Key symptoms include hives, hoarse voice, and wheezing are very significant indications. Other notable symptoms that may occur include:

• Abdominal pain
• Diarrhea
• Difficulty swallowing
• Itching of the mouth, throat, eyes, skin, or any area
• Light-headedness or fainting
• Nasal congestion
• Nausea
• Runny nose
• Swelling (angioedema), especially of the eyelids, face, lips, and tongue
• Shortness of breath
• Stomach cramps
• Bloating and gas
• Vomiting

Symptoms of oral allergy syndrome:

• Itchy lips, tongue, and throat
• Swollen lips (sometimes)

Treatment
The most common treatment for food allergies is to avoid the food culprit altogether.

Other treatments include:

• Antihistamines: Over-the-counter medication (combats the histamines) to ease the symptoms of minor food allergic reactions.
• Injectable Epinephrine: (Epi-Pen) For the treatment of severe food allergies. Anyone diagnosed with a food allergy should carry (and know how to use) injectable epinephrine at all times. For any type of serious or whole-body reaction (even hives) after eating the offending food, it is advised to inject the epinephrine and seek immediate emergency medical attention.

Living without another lick of an ice cream cone or bite of a peanut can be hard for some to swallow. However; over the years, I’ve come up with several delicious alternatives for food allergy sufferers. See my article: Most Common Food Allergies & What to Eat Instead.

Also visit:

• How to Cook Up a Passionate Meal for Two
• The Best Foods for Your Heart
• Foods That Fight Aging
• Are You Fat (But Look Normal)? VIDEO
  

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For daily expert updates, follow genConnect on Twitter (@genConnected) and Facebook (www.facebook.com/genConnect).

When I want to stack the deck in my favor and get someone’s attention, I always extend an invitation to dinner. Having the home court advantage gives you the edge to create and execute that perfect romantic dining experience to entice your love interest.

Looking for a way to make a night in extra special? Why not heat things up by cooking with foods that ignite and rev up the romance factor? It’s been documented that such foods like: chocolate, oysters, figs and ginger possess aphrodisiac properties to promote desire, passion and sustain energy and love. Spice up your night with these ingredients incorporated into a lover’s feast.

Seduction Menu:

Starter: Arugula Salad with Fresh Figs, Goat Cheese, and Roasted Red Peppers.

• Toss 2 cups of arugula, 6 figs (cut into halves), and roasted pepper strips with olive oil and balsamic vinegar.
• Top with dots of goat cheese.

The peppery arugula is the perfect compliment for the silky goat cheese and the succulent figs. The seductive flavor of the figs in tandem with the roasted peppers will get the juices flowing, in anticipation of what’s to follow….

Entrée: Ginger and Chive Crusted Halibut with Mashed Rutabaga and Rainbow Chard.

• Grate fresh ginger, chop chives, and liberally coat the Halibut fillet.
• Salt and pepper the fish and place in a hot non-stick skillet with olive oil and cook for 8 minutes.
• Peel and cut rutabaga into ½” slices and cook in boiling salted water
• Drain and mash with butter and heavy cream
• Sauté rainbow chard with olive oil and garlic.

Fish is a great choice to keep you light on your feet… or off them. The fresh ginger increases blood flow and warms the body to prepare you for what the night will bring….

Dessert: Vanilla Bean Custard with Dark Chocolate Ganache and Raspberries.

• Whisk egg yolks, sugar, vanilla bean and heavy cream together.
• Bake the custard in ramekins in a water bath at 300 degrees for about 30 minutes or until the center is just set.
• Let cool.
• Heat heavy cream just to simmer and add the dark chocolate, stir until smooth and set aside.
• When the custard has cooled, top with the dark chocolate ganache and let set.
• Top with raspberries.

The dark chocolate is filled with anti-oxidants to increase energy to ready you for the activity soon to ensue. The sweet vanilla custard and the raspberries will provide you with the sustained energy you’ll need to go the distance.

More from genConnect:

• Marcus Samuelsson: The Taste of Heritage
• The Best Foods for your Heart
• Eat Chocolate and 4 Other Rules to Live By

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